1. I’ve never read Milton’s “Paradise Lost” but I keep it on my bookshelf because it makes me look smart.
2. As a kid aged 12, I planned my suicide to look like a break-and-enter gone horribly wrong. Suffice to say my schemes were logistically unsound and I never carried it out.
3. At my year 7 camp some blonde haired thugs pushed me into the urinal wall while I was still pissing. The rest of the camp I tried to keep a low profile and was very secretly relieved when these same guys turned their attentions to my roommate. I felt guilty that I never said anything instead of laughing along but my god did he fucking snore.
4. I am currently downloading a porno called “Here cums the bridegroom”
5. I have a very hairy back.
6. As part of our bi-centenary celebrations my grade-three class had a fancy dress day. While most kids came dressed as convicts I insisted on coming as Captain Arthur Phillip.
7. I get far too much satisfaction out of popping pimples.
8. I have a healthy sperm count.
I am in turn tagging Strummer. Good night and good luck.
Admiral Arthur Phillip (1786 portrait by Francis Wheatley, National Portrait Gallery, London)
4 comments:
Ha! I once downloaded a massive orgy scene from the classic porno 'How the west was hung'.
I don't understand why there isn't a porno called 'Bareback Mounting'. Yes, I have searched for it.
How do you know you have a healthy sperm count though - and more importantly, why?
dreck - i downloaded this film called "Mars Needs Men" months and months ago. set on October 30 1938, the day that infamous radio adaptation of Verne's "War of the Worlds" was broadcast (voiced as we know by Orson Welles) and public panic spread throughout the north east of the states. anyway the characters in the film, convinced that the world was ending decide to spend their last moments in the arms of their fellow man. say no more.
richard - i had a little health scare a few months ago. while i mentioned a certain testicilar ultrasound i'd had a few posts ago, i failed to mention the sperm & urine screenings that were all part of my doctor's "it's probably nothing but we just need to be sure" set of humiliating tests. suffice to say it's nothing malignant or otherwise terrifying and my sperm are numerous and national champion swimmers.
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